The Seven Stages of Menopausal Grief

Friday, June, 24, 2016 < Back to Blog Posts

So, if you are reading this, it means you are most likely starting to see some signs of perimenopause or menopause. Or, perhaps you have a friend, sister or even Mom that you are wondering about.
Whatever the case…it is going to be very helpful for you to realize what you are experiencing is very similar to your peers across the world. Things we have in common help us not to feel so alone. It’s helpful to understand that some things we go through, although they can be new and frightening to us, actually have some predictability and stages. Researchers know that when someone passes away, most people go through seven stages of grief. If we take that same fundamental idea, perhaps we also go through at least seven stages of menopausal grief. Stick with me and see what you think!
1)Stage One: Shock and Denial
This happens after your first “aha moment” that you might actually be starting the change. You might react like this:
“No Way! I’m too (you fill in the blank) to be starting menopause. (You might be thinking things like “young” or “busy.”)
“Are you (you fill in the blank) kidding me?”
2)Stage Two: Pain and Guilt
This can be physical and/or emotional. Perhaps you wish you would have accomplished more by this age, or at least you will give a lot of credence to that idea. Your periods could become erratic and filled with even more discomfort than usual.
3)Stage Three: Anger and Bargaining
By this time you may be promising your higher power ridiculous things like you’ll never eat chocolate again if only you can be the one woman since the beginning of time that could skip anything to do with menopause. (This has not been known to work by the way.)
4)   Stage Four: Sadness, Reflections, Loneliness
You can have times of great moodiness and being down on yourself.  You might be reflecting on the fact that you still have wrinkles no matter how many creams or lotions you buy. If you aren’t talking to girlfriends or reading articles like this, you can start to think you are in this alone.
5) Stage Five: The Upward Turn
This is when you hopefully have done your research or talked to the right doctor or friend and have found out that there is hope and hormone free help from Remifemin® and Remifemin® Good Night.
6) Stage Six: Reconstruction and Working Through
You get serious about sticking with your Remifemin regimen and watching what you eat. For the first time in your life you get consistent with exercising and taking care of yourself. The wisdom of your life so far becomes more apparent. 
7) Stage Seven: Acceptance and Hope
This is the stage where you know you are going to be OK.  You might even be helping someone else who is way back in step one.
So, tell me.  Where are you on your menopausal journey? Are you taking Remifemin? Take a moment to really explore all the areas of our website. Explore the clinical studies section where you will see that Remifemin has been proven effective and is one of the most clinically studied alternative interventions for menopause symptoms,* with 60 years of use in Europe and the U.S.  See all your peers’ archived questions and Dr. Minkin’s answers in the “Ask The Doctor” section. As a world-renowned certified OB/GYN & clinical professor at Yale, she has answers to many questions you are wondering about…through all the stages you are going through. Learn about the basics of perimenopause and menopause. With all the knowledge you gain from our Remifemin website, you may be able to skip a few steps of the seven phases and get right to stage 7 much more quickly. And that’s a good place to be.
Michele is a real person who is experiencing menopause just like you. If you have a menopause-related question, a story to share, or you just need to vent, go to our Remifemin Facebook page.