A Letter to the Man in Your Life

Tuesday, July, 1, 2014 < Back to Blog Posts

Mood swings.


Hot flashes.

What happened to the old you? It may be hard enough for you to understand, but what about the man in your life? It’s something he’s not going to go through, and that makes it even more difficult. He’ll never “walk a mile in your shoes.”

Here’s a letter to pass along. Ask the man in your life to read these tips so he knows how he can help, and that you aren’t the only one going through this. It’s a way to start the conversation that you’re not just being mean, or hard to live with. Something real is happening in your body. You may think he won’t want to read this, or that he won’t understand, but why not try? It’s all part of being good to yourself as you go through menopause.

To the Man in my life,

You may have noticed that life has not been the easiest for me lately, and therefore maybe not the easiest for you either. That’s because I’m going through menopause. I wish I could just skip it, but that is not my choice.

If you can understand and walk with me on the journey, it’s going to make a trying time just a little better. First of all, because of menopause, I am likely to experience hot flashes, night sweats, mood swings and occasional sleeplessness. Sometimes, it will be worse than others, but this is not a short term thing. Menopause can last for years.

It’s going to take a lot of patience on your part. I’m often not going to be reasonable, and I may cry at the silliest things. It’s all part of what’s happening inside of me. Good old hormones…but believe me, as hard as it is for you, living through it is no picnic for me. It’s often very frustrating. Sometimes, I can barely make it through day-to-day life in the “outside” world – it’s exhausting to keep it together at work. Home needs to be a safe place.

Another place you may have to show more patience is the bedroom. My body is changing without my permission…and I have to figure out how to work through this…but I hope we can do this together.

I’ve been doing my research, and I found something that I believe will help me. I’m taking a clinically-tested, unique black cohosh extract called Remifemin® menopause relief that has been shown to improve menopausal symptoms like hot flashes, mood swings, irritability and related occasional sleeplessness.* It’s an alternative to Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT). It’s been used safely by women in Europe for nearly 60 years. You can find out more at remifemin.com if you’d like to do your own research.

So, thank you for giving me a hug, telling me you love me, that you appreciate me and for hanging in there. Menopause will end at some point, but while I have to go through it, I need you to understand and be there for me.

I can tell you it’s not easy, it makes life harder, and I need all the tender loving care you can offer. I will try as best as I can to stay on an even keel, but just remind yourself that I am going through a very real thing, and if you can try not being offended or hurt when I’m having a very hard day, I know that will help. Try to remember the real me, “the me” that had it together and didn’t struggle so much. I’m still in there. I will appreciate anything you can do to help me through this.

One day, we’ll be back to normal. And maybe, because of the patience and love it took to get through menopause, we’ll be even stronger and closer. We can hope! Thanks for reading this, and understanding.

Then just close it as you wish. You might use this as a template and put it in your own words, but the point is, have this conversation with the man in your life. It can’t hurt!

Michele is a real person who is experiencing menopause just like you. If you have a menopause-related question, a story to share, or you just need to vent, go to our Remifemin Facebook page.